I Don’t Know
Attention in the Now
At a family gathering this past weekend, we played a game where we submitted the titles of the memoir we could write about ourselves. I wasn’t allowed to use Star Sister or The Universe is Generous; I had to come up with a new one. I chose the title of this post and I want to tell you why because it has an awful lot to do with Resonant Attention.
Within the perception of Interbeing, “I don’t know” becomes the only ground upon which to stand. When we clear out trauma and radically calm down into the now moment, the fact that everything around us is constantly changing emerges as the only truth we can point to with any surety. “Is”ness and even beingness are fleeting and only reflective of the relationships in which they are currently enmeshed.
Practically speaking, if somebody asks me if they have x, y, or z disease, I can’t answer. Perhaps they do now, but will they a few moments from now? I could guess the answer, but I can’t be sure. So diagnosis is out, especially if I don’t want to contribute to a pathway for it through belief. That would be a form of black magic.
For this reason, I contain myself to supporting the body as I find it. When somebody lies on my table, I ask, “What is the body working on now?” I then use my resonant attention to augment the body’s own healing capacity. Perhaps I’ll make a suggestion in one direction or another, but I try to remain neutral, because, ultimately, I don’t know.
The thing I don’t know the most when I’m working on someone is what their outcome will be. They’ve come for healing, so that is my intention, but when I fully comprehend the enormity of possibilities that might ultimately serve their soul, I am humbled. I trust that my intention will be heard, but I can’t force it. There are too many unseen pathways and beautiful outcomes I could squelch with my ‘certainty.’
Paradoxically, sometimes I am certain. Sometimes I know exactly what to do—and then I act. This usually feels like a full-body yes! There simply is no doubt. It can be very hard to wait for that feeling, but when I do, I don’t regret it, and when I don’t, I do. I’ve learned that the hard way—and am still learning it.
Love,
Stella
PS - There is still time to sign up for this weekend’s Group Healing Session. It’ll be June 25th at 11am EASTERN. It’ll be recorded, but it’s better if you can be present.