Our Father

Who Art in Healing

Activating self-healing is largely a matter of coherence. When our right and left brains are simultaneously activated, and we enter the state of flow that the Daoists spoke about as ‘Wu Wei,’ our doing and non-doing metabolizes and repairs imbalances, traumas, and limitations.

Coming to understand this was also a matter of balancing my right and left brain functionality. Having grown up in the rational, linear, materialist indoctrination of the Western school system, I devalued the multi-dimensional, emergent, living information that my right brain perceives and had to carve out a place for it through practice and trust. That process is ongoing.

The other day, I was working in someone’s field and I realized that the entire way I talk about healing is very left brain, albeit cutting edge. The field of consciousness is broken down into its component parts of attention, allowance, and specificity. It’s non-material, but still deductive. And that wasn’t what my client needed.

Realizing that my client’s core wound was around not feeling safe or loved, I coached her not to just ‘get behind herself,’ a clinically cold way to understand the attitude of allowing, but to feel the way God loves the body part we were working with and the way it was expressing itself.

We did this together and, I, too, began to feel God’s love, which was specifically a male presence, God the Father. I could feel Him looking down at her bones so tenderly, loving them and her just as they were.

Imagine the most careful, present Father holding his newborn baby in his giant hands. In his gaze, nothing is wrong. You are loved through and through just as you are. Even your confusion, which puts your tissues and organs into disarray, is loved absolutely. And your healing is loved too.

As we relaxed back into that love, my client’s bones released any resistance they had to that love. She gratefully surrendered into his divine plan, which was her wholeness. I was moved, too.

Reflecting on it later, I realized that I had never really felt God’s presence before. Growing up, I went to Catholic mass every Sunday with my family, but found little to relate to. The statues of Mary holding Jesus were lovely, but I frankly felt repulsed by the gory images of the crucification—and even considered the veneration of them to be somewhere between unfortunate and demonic.

Later, I made peace with my deep sense of the in-dwelling divinity of the world around me by identifying Mother Earth as my object of devotion. I was delighted when the beloved woman who married me and my husband brought forth a practice in the Tibetan Buddhist tradition of calling forth Gaia herself. This matched my understanding of Mother Earth as the living field of love all around me, which included Jesus, and probably a father figure, though I couldn’t really say.

Now it occurs to me that my inability to perceive God the Father was a wound that spontaneously healed in concert with my client’s healing. After all, it’s imbalanced to perceive Mother Earth, but not, as the Diné would say, Father Sky. And of late I have been releasing stagnations in my inner ear and right eye. Perhaps my return to wholeness includes a more balanced perception of God and the cosmos.

But it’s not just my head and conception of the world that feels healed. Mostly, it’s my. heart.

Love,

Stella

PS - Our next group healing session will be this Sunday, April 12th. Paid subscribers will receive the link about an hour before start time, 11am eastern.